From Tracie: This Is The True Candy Crush Saga

Wednesday, May 01, 2013

This Is The True Candy Crush Saga

When I saw the name Candy Crush Saga, my first thought was, "'Saga?' Really? It is a facebook game. I think 'saga' is a bit of an overstatement." The first levels were easy. It was like playing Bejewled Blitz - with bigger pieces and sudden sugar cravings thrown in for fun.

When I hit levels in the 30's it started getting harder. I needed to ask for lives. I discussed strategy with Katarina. The word saga was starting to make a little bit more sense.

On Level 97, I got desperate. Two weeks in on 97, I was on twitter asking @deana_bo to come to my house, and beat it for me.

Asking random people on twitter to come to your house and play Candy Crush Saga, isn't like riding around in a van and offering candy to kids, is it? It feels a little too close. Now I am thinking Deana might have cause to be afraid of me, since apparently I tired to kidnap her via Twitter.

Is "Candy Crush made me do it" a legitimate defense?

I took a break for a couple of days to prove that I did not need Candy Crush in my life. Then I came back to beat Level 97. Now I am stuck on Level 107. (Hey Deana, what are you doing this weekend?)

I thought I understood the saga of Candy Crush...until I tried to teach Thomas how to play, and learned the true saga.

He did fine in the early levels (that is how they pull us in), but the jelly levels proved to be a struggle.

I started giving him advice. He was receptive, if a little disgruntled by the amount of progress I had made since we started playing. I was happy to help him.

I told Thomas he needed to cross two special candies to clear more of the board in one move. He did not know this was possible, so we spent several lives setting up a great move. He was very focused on seeing something blow up or a lot of pieces disappear.

Can you see the move?
Candy Crush Saga Board

It was perfect. I pointed at the screen, "Match the three yellow candies, and you will finally have your big move." I tapped on the appropriate pieces for emphasis.

"Okay. I'll match the yellow pieces..." he said as he reached for the mouse.

"NO! No! No! NO! What did you do? Why would you do that? What is wrong with you?"

He had moved the green stripy piece sideways - connecting the three yellows, and making it impossible to cross the stripy green and polka dot chocolate pieces.

It was a tragedy.

All those moves. All those lives. Wasted. Lost. No big clearing of the board.

Thomas looked up at me, and said, "We can try again, right?"

"Yes. But you can't do that again."

We both started to giggle at the absurdity, and I said, "This makes me think of that scene in The Office when Erin did not use the word apoplexy in her Scrabble game."

The Office scene: Oscar and Pam help Erin play Scrabble. They play until she has one turn left. Pam wants her to get the satisfaction of playing the winning move. Oscar reluctantly agrees, and gives her a big hint," Erin, I will have apoplexy if you lose. Do you understand? Apoplexy is what I will have." She nods happily, gives Oscar a look of understanding, and makes the move. A sad sound comes from her phone, indicating her loss, and Oscar begins to have a breakdown. It cuts to Erin saying, "I played ape."

I helped Thomas set up another perfect move, and pointed carefully at the correct pieces on the screen. "You want to get the stripy piece by the polka dot chocolate one."

Time slowed. In my concentration, I forgot to breathe for a moment.

This was it.

Thomas' hand moved the mouse. He clicked.

A quick swipe of his wrist, and....he moved the wrong piece.

He moved the wrong piece, y'all. I could hardly believe it.

I screamed. He screamed. Katarina screamed. There might have been tears.

And then I had apoplexy.

Do you play Candy Crush Saga?
Who wants to come to my house, and beat Level 107 for me?

58 comments:

  1. I'm still stuck on 33. I think Thomas and I might be well matched!

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    1. I'm stuck on lev 97 what a pain in my .......!

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  2. 6 months ago, I was really into this. But no one would send me lives, so I got stuck. And quit. Now everyone is playing, but I'm afraid of the addiction!

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    1. Don't come back.

      I mean, do come back...but really, don't. It will hold you tighter in a chocolate pool if you come back.

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  3. Dude, this is a BRILLIANT post.

    Also? I've googled tips on how to beat certain levels...I felt like a cheater doing it!

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    1. Ha! I did that for level 97. There was a small twinge of cheatery feelings, but they all shook out when I did the happy dance upon finally beating it.

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    2. It's not cheating if u win :-)

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  4. I'm at 140. 13o-something kept me for weeks. Then I got it and the next few were easy. Now it sucks again. My husband is at 147 and has been for a while. I fear 147.

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    1. They do seem to put a couple of easy ones after the particularly hard ones. I think that is part of their evil strategy to keep us involved.

      Don't even talk of 147. I'm not ready.

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    2. I'm stuck on 147 for a month now! Grrrrr

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    3. Ugh level 147 you will lose your mind!!!!!

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  5. I haven't dared try Candy Crush Saga...because of this exact reason! It really does sound like drama! By the way, your site was still loading by the time I finished reading. I couldn't see the image you posted. :( Bummer!

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    1. It really is some major drama.

      I'm sorry the picture didn't load. I noticed that the stumbleupon button was timing out earlier, and I think that was causing issues.

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  6. I'm stuck! Now I need to kidnap you!

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    1. Bring it on! I'm free this weekend ;-)

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  7. I have a solitaire game on my phone that I use to put myself to sleep if I'm having trouble. Other than that -- no games. AT ALL.

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    1. Candy Crush is not good for putting you to sleep - it is too infuriating. Plus it makes you hungry for candy.

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  8. Crying, crying with laughter! Just read this entire post to Lisa over the phone and we were both dying!! Best post ever.-The Dose Girls

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    1. Ha!! Thanks. It does improve with a (dramatic) out loud reading. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

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  9. I've never played and now I'm totally afraid to start. It would turn me into a mad woman! This is hilarious!

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    Replies
    1. Stay away. Stay far, far away! ;-)

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  10. Omg this is the only game I play now since becoming a blogger! I am on level 216 now

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    1. Level 216!?!?!

      I can't even talk to you.

      Unless....what are you doing this weekend? I passed 107, and now 108 has me stumped! ;-)

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  11. omg lol this cracks me up. I just started playing this couple days ago because everyone has been talking about it. I have to say I am now addicted!!! I swear we will all need candy crush rehab soon!!

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    1. We really will! With a full 12 steps. Maybe we will call them the 12 levels to ease us into it...and we will eat chocolate at all of our meetings.

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  12. I've never heard of this game. I don't play any online or video games. I'm sure people that do play this game are loving this post!!

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    1. At least they now know that they are not alone. Especially if they are trying to teach other people how to play.

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  13. Nope, nope, nope. I will not play. I will not play. I almost failed a semester of college because of The Sims, I refuse to play any more addictive games.

    Loved this post, though.

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    1. I totally want to come at you like a full-on Candy Crush pusher right now...come on, you know you want to do it....

      But I love you, so I'm holding back. Stay safely far away from the saga.

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  14. Level 86 here and frustrated as hell. I can't believe the hold this game has on me. It is a saga alright, me versus the game. I think I keep playing out of sheer stubbornness. Candy crush will not win!
    I don't even usually play these kinds of games...btw, can I tell you how sad I am after reading @TabbyAnn's comment. Level 216?!? Doesn't it EVER end?

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    1. I had the exact same reaction when I saw TabbyAnn mention Level 216. I think we are going to need some sort of support group to get us through this.

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    2. Couldnt have put it better myself

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  15. I don't get involved in those games. I am way to busy. The closest thing that I got roped into was Farmville, but I let it die.

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    1. The nice thing about Candy Crush is that you can just play it for a few minutes when you are in between other things. The bad thing about Candy Crush is that you get sucked in and want to play it all day long.

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  16. oh my goodness, I stay far away from games like that, facebook is already one addiction!

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  17. I have been stuck on level 135 for a few days and it is DRIVING ME INSANE! LOL! I finally had to put my ipad away and not think about the game. LOL!

    Also, I always crave candy while playing!!!

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  18. I hate you candy crush, then I love you.

    It's a love hate thing.

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  19. I have avoided the Crush with a vengeance. Everyone I know has been sucked in. I knew I would be too because I love Bejeweled!

    :-)
    Traci

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  20. This is enlightening and now I know that I should never, ever give into the temptation to play CC. Just like the real, caloric, stuff, just one little piece and i am hooked!

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  21. OMG, you slay me, Tracie.
    I have stayed away from Candy Crush Saga, but I love games like this. I play versions of this on the iPad (Puzzle Quest was my undoing some time ago). Well, until I discovered blogging. :)

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  22. It is so addicting.. I was buying lives not knowing I could wait n even ask friends to send me lives... :/
    Now I save ny extra lives n moves for hard levels... I am now lifeless at level 107.... Good luck!! The bombs are a pain...

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  23. Any help for level 305

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  24. I think you should come beat level 97 for me!!! I even mixed the stripy candy and the chocolate ball and my score still isn't high enough. :(

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  25. Hi Tracie,

    great blog!!! Maybe you'll come to my house to do level 97? A small trip to Germany where you'll have a lot of time to choose the right tactic for that @#$& Level! ;-)

    Greetings from "across the pond"

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  26. I need someone to get me past level 140!!!!!!!!! it is driving me MAD

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  27. anyone want to come get me past level 140???? anyone anyone

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  28. 97 stuck on you....question... when the ask fb friends thing pops up do you have to type or click the names every time???

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  29. I need to know how to beat level 140 on Candy Crush Saga. It is so hard with the orders to get 99 red, yellow, and orange. I get SO close, and then run out of moves every time. I've been stuck on level 140 for almost three weeks now, and it is driving me crazy.

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    1. I feel your pain! I just, finally, beat that level today...after almost four weeks of being stuck. It was killer. Now I'm waiting for people to send me the Candy Crush tickets so I can move on to level 141, and I'm hoping that it will be an easy one!

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  30. I know how u feel,, I been stuck in level 147 for a few wks bow, an its becoming very frustrating. I mean come in now how long can u actually be stuck on one level, wks months maybe even yrs , crazy game, but fun

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  31. I am on 316 and it keeps on crashing...

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  32. If u want extra lives go into setting change date go into candy crush lives will reset then go and change the date back lol

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  33. I'm at Level 107 too. It is seriously making me want to quit. I've gotten down to 1 move and couldn't get it!

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  34. I too am stuck on Level 147. I've been stuck for over a week and it's the longest I've been stuck. I hate this game, I love this game, I hate this game...you get the picture.

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  35. OMG I want my life back, I think candy crush, I dream candy crush. Today my manager was talking to me and I heard no words, the only thing on my mind was if 30 minutes had gone by and had my life refreshed. I'm so over this........no I'm not. I don't even thing I enjoy playing this $#&@!$% game. I think I'm just too stubborn to quit.

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  36. I found your refreshing blog while looking for tips for level 107! Thanks for my morning smile! I am afraid that I will be stuck here forever! Lol.

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  37. OMG, I am stuck on 140 and it seems impossible! Talk about dreaming about Candy Crush, every time I see the white and blue AT&T emblem I think about the white and blue striped cadies, lol. Anyway, I did find a way to refill your lives without waiting or having them sent by a friend, now if I could just find a way to get unlimited chocolate candy+striped candy combos I would, we'll I don't know I guess I will then have to find a way to get unlimited tickets to he next episode because I hate waiting for people to send them and I refuse to buy them! Thanks for this post, I don't feel so alone now.

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