From Tracie: Princesses and Love Letters

Monday, February 06, 2012

Princesses and Love Letters

We did this last week (which explains why I don't have short hair going on in this picture), but it is still making me happy, and I have to share. Beauty and the Beast in 3D - totally worth it. Belle has always been my favorite princess.

Beauty and the Beast in 3D movie poster
(Yes, people gave us funny looks as we took this picture.
No, I didn't care.)

There are three important qualities about Belle that make her the best, and smartest Disney princess:
1. She is a brunette.
2. She loves books the way I love books.
3. She doesn't fall for the first good looking guy who came along asking her to marry him.

I remember going to see Beauty and the Beast in the theater when it first came out. I was eight years old, and it was magical. So it was really special that Katarina got to see it on the big screen at the same age (especially since it is her favorite, too).

And it is always nice to have a chance to rock those stylish 3D glasses, right? snort.

***Wait! There is one more happy thing!*** 
Amy Sullivan asked me to be a contributor to Love Letters to the Underloved, and it went live today. You can find my letter to survivors of abuse on page 15, and beautiful, encouraging letters from great writers on all the other pages. 

What is making you happy today?


  1. Wasnt it awesome? ... & yeah, I'm totally a Belle myself :)

  2. Y'all look wonderful ... and very happy! :)

  3. Oh Tracie ... I went and looked at Love Letters after leaving my comment and wow ... I'm speechless! And in tears! I love you, girlie!

  4. My daughter is 33 years old, and still such a fan of Disney. She loves Belle, too, but her favorite is Ariel.

    What can I say? She is young at heart!


  5. I can't wait to see this. B and the B was my favorite movie growing up!

  6. Tracie - thank you for writing that. As I read it I cried, because sometimes, just sometimes, I wish I could learn to forgive, trust, and love myself before it is to late - my greatest fear, is I will learn this to late. Each day I try to learn it, by doing something to honor myself, but I feel far from FEELING it, and also, allowing myself to learn it, knowing there are set-backs, but just because I make 1 mistake in a day, it does not cloud the numerous good things' I did accomplish that day...The hard part in learning to forgive me is I have been told I have no reason to forgive myself, there is nothing to forgive myself for because I did not know different and did not have a choice, yet it is still a battle for me to not carry the shame.The hard things in learning to trust me, is how often I trusted others' and realized what I never had, that I was not reading social cues correctly and it was never picked up and diagnosed, so while i always trusted others' - even people who abused, and "hurt" me, I never realized how much I was missing until I got correctly diagnosed and am now getting help with this, but it leaves me with no choice, but to really not trust myself now.The hard thing about learning to love me, is I was taught to hate me, and loving me is self-ish, that I will never be "good enough", always "sick", and have to "settle" - to me words, so often hurt MORE then any of the actions' even.I was told my disability is likely why I survived and was able to endure things' beyond a normal human capacity - in a way because I could not process it, or understand it, I was able to survive far more. I thought about this, and I suppose it is an ability born of my dis-ability, so I need to be grateful in a way. The hard part of that is as I am beginning to learn things' I needed to learn long ago - in early intervention, which I am told I had desparatly needed - another hard thing because my delay was not around when I was young, so that was the reason no one saw it, or when my 1st pediatrician said I had a developmental delay, but he could not name it, he could not explain it because it was not something he had encountered - it had yet to be given a name. Now , after years' of not getting fitting treatment, I am beginning at the beginning in so many ways' - but as I learn to process, I see how I am beginning to process what has happened to me and that is so hard...I still struggle with understanding it and not just seeing what was said and done to me as "sick" and that we are limited to help these people, so why be angry over something that is more of a societal limitation, yet it hurts because I blame me for it - I do not understand how I could not...It made me cry because I want to heal so badly - move on, but I still am really struggling more often. My doctors' tell me the PTSD I have and also, even my eating issues, are in part due to going un-diagnosed and not something I need to balme me for because one of the issues was communication - a major part. 2 be continued....I cannot submit more in this 1 entry.

  7. From to be continued...
    I do find healing in movement, in art - more then anything, in playing music, composing, even writing, but when I have to sit and talk, that gets harder because I tedn to shut-down and even when I can SAY what happened, it is just words' - a narrative of it, I have yet ot be able to emote it and some have a hard time working with me, as an adult in such primary-bsaed therapy, some do not....the ones who do, it hurts because I blame me for not being able to be at a point they would maybe like, or move as quick as they want, or be the adult I am, yet am not developmentally, even if my intellect is higher then normal - that was a dis-service in so many ways' - it was what hey say let me go "under-the-radar" without the intervention.Your story made me cry, as did others', it gave me some more hope and faith, that one day, I will not blame me or carry the shame still, very often do...I can admit that. Sometimes, I just long for some peace, for a bit, from this, and it seems so far away...
    Thanks, the tears felt more healing today, and thanks for allowing me to feel mroe permission, to heal and not take on all the blame and shame...
    I am not sure what else to write...sometimes, there are no words - for me it is more then not, but anyway, I hope this shows you how much your story effected me.

  8. That without a doubt is my favorite Disney movie ever, followed by Little Mermaid

  9. But of course! She was my favorite always too--for those exact same reasons :)